"Car Talk" Presented by Shelley and Shelley

Did you know that Mardi Gras is celebrated outside of Lousiana? Neither did we, until last night, when Steve and Shelley took us to a Mardi Gras parade in Gavelston. While we waited, Steve showed John and our “new” Texan friends a game where you have to push a bottle forward while balancing on one hand.

On the way home, the conversation turned to golf carts.
Steve: I still can’t figure out why the lights on my golf cart won’t work.
Shelley Smith: I remember, while in elementary school, attaching wires from a battery to a light. If the light didn’t work, it was because the wires were attached backwards. Could it be that?
Steve: No. I checked. But thanks. I didn’t know you knew so much about cars and trucks. In fact, years ago, you phoned home, because the oldsmobile had broken down. Dad and I couldn’t believe it when you said you had already checked the muffler, so that wasn’t the problem. We tried to think of other ridiculous stuff for you to check next, like the radio, or the tires or water in the radiator.
John: Shelley told me that story. Didn’t she call it the “muff?”

Everyone: Ha! Ha! Ha!

Shelley Smith: But, I’ve come a long way since then. Now I know a whole lot about trucks. For instance, we have a 2007 GMC, 6 gear, 2500 Duramax, shortbox truck.
Steve: Wow. That’s impressive. So, how many cylinders does your truck have?
Shelley Smith: Definitely eight. But to be honest, I’m not really sure what a cylinder is.
Everyone: Ha! Ha! Ha!
What Steve and John said: Well, a cylinder is just like a…..
What Shelley and Shelley heard: Moohwaahh…waahhhhhh mowahhh……wahhhhh…..

Steve: John, listen to this. Shelley Orr, how many cylinders does your car have?
Shelley Orr:….Eight?
Steve: No.
Shelley Orr:….. Six?
Steve: No.
Shelley Orr:…. Five?
Steve: No.
Shelley Orr:…….Four?
Steve: Yes!
Shelley Smith: Well done. Excellent strategy by starting high. It left you room for more guesses.
Shelley Orr: Why thank you.
Shelley Smith: In fact, you could add that to your list of talents. Although, it’s not nearly as impressive as your super talent of being able to consume a vat of wine, then get up early the next morning, for a huge run.
Shelley Orr: (Modestly) True. True.
Everyone: Ha! Ha! Ha!
Steve: OK, smart asses, how many cylinders does a golf cart have?

Shelley and Shelley: (Turning to each other)……………
Shelley Orr: What do you think?
Shelley Smith: Not sure. But I did see six batteries.
Shelley Orr: I don’t think batteries have cylinders. Do you?
Shelley Smith: Hmmm. I don’t know, because I still don’t understand what they are. But, perhaps you’re right. What about pistons? Does “pistons” sound right to you?
Shelley Orr: Pistons?…..Maybe….
Shelley and Shelley: Wait a second. Steve, are you trying to trick us?
Shelley and Shelley: Golf carts don’t have cylinders. They have six batteries that power six pistons. There. That’s our answer! We are so awesome!
Shelley Smith: Shelley! I have an idea. We should start our own “Car Talk” radio show. You know, where people phone in and ask us how to fix their cars.
Shelley Orr: Definitely.
Steve: Just promise me neither one of you will touch my golf cart.

Shelley and John


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