What is it About Bodily Functions?

Lousiana’s I 10 is built on cement pylons over swamp.

Isn’t it interesting how bodily functions are either highly offensive or highly entertaining? For example, on the way back from Louisiana……

Shelley: Oh! My! God!!! John!!!! You stink! Gak! Gak! GaK!
John: It wasn’t me.
Shelley: BS. Can you at least roll down the window before you do that?
John: It wasn’t me.
Shelley: That is so not true. Would you have done “that” if we were on our first date?
John: It wasn’t me and we’re not on our first date.
Shelley: Would you have at least rolled down the window, if we were on our first date?
John: It wasn’t me. But if it was me on our first date, I would have.
Shelley: If it wasn’t you, why did you lean to one side?
John: It wasn’t me. I leaned to one side so I could see out the window. Why don’t you look out the window? Can you see those oil refineries? Did you stop to think that it could be them?

Shelley: It wasn’t. It was you. Admit it.
John: Maybe it was you.
Shelley: Not a chance. Besides, “I” don’t stink.

John: Ohhhhh I forgot. You’re perfect! Speaking of perfect, remember Jim’s story of the “perfect monster poop?”
Shelley: Oh! Ha! Ha! Ha! Yes, but tell it again.
John: Picture Jim teaching his Social Studies class, when another teacher knocks on his door. He tells Jim to go to the men’s toilets. Right away. Although Jim says he’s teaching, the other teacher pushes Jim out the door.
Shelley: When Jim reaches the men’s room, he opens the cubicle door and sees a sheet of paper taped above the toilet. It says…
Shelley and John:”Do not flush! Possible world record!”
John: Curious, he opens the lid, looks inside, and there it is….the most “perfect monster poop” coiled round and round filling the entire bowl.
Shelley and John: Oh! Ha! Ha! Ha!
Shelley: He didn’t flush, right?
John: Are you kidding? He knocked on the next teacher’s door.
Shelley and John: Oh! Ha! Ha! Ha!
Shelley: Imagine what would have happened if the students found out.
John: Or the Principal.
Shelley and John: Oh! Ha! Ha! Ha!
Shelley: Promise me you’ll open the window next time.
John:….. Jesus Christ Shelley!

Shelley and John


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