John wanted to be in Palm Springs. By noon.
Shelley: Why don’t we sort out my glasses first and then take care of the tires? It won’t take long.
What John thinks: “That” is not true. But, she’s a little rattled from working on the accounts this morning. Ahhh…
What John says: Great idea.
Shelley: Hi. I’m Shelley and I need a new pair of glasses.
Lyndon: Hey. I’m Lyndon. Do you want to put the new lenses in the old frames?
Shelley: Oh I wish but, I lost them. Just my luck that they were the expensive, progressive ones.
What John thinks: Noooooo!!! She’s going to chat. Please be a no nonsense, non-chatty, kind of salesman.
What John says: Hi.
Lyndon: That is some seriously bad luck. What happened?
What John thinks: And here we go.
Shelley: Well, we were visiting the National White Sands Monument and the next thing I knew, they were gone. We tried to find them, but, (blah blah blah)……
Lyndon: I’ve never been to (blah blah blah)……
What John thinks:
What John says: (Nothing. There’s no point.)
Lyndon: Let me show you some frames.
Shelley: OK. But I’m going to warn you that I’m on a strict financial budget, so they can’t be too pricey.
What John thinks: But apparently not on a strict time budget. 20 minutes and she hasn’t even started.
What John says: Don’t rush. I’ll just read this.
Shelley: John, what about these?
What John thinks: Nice.
What John says: Nice.
Shelley: Oh… I just don’t know. These?
What John says: Take your time. I don’t want you to be unhappy with them.
Lyndon: Shelley, I know that you’ve tried on only black. But, some people like their glasses to be more neutral. Try these.
Shelley: Look at this hair. Do you really think I worry about being neutral?
Shelley and Lyndon: Ha! Ha! Ha!
What John thinks: They’re killing me.
What John says: I’ll just get my book.
Shelley: Oh Lyndon, I just can’t make up my mind. What about something way out there? Just for fun.
Lyndon: I have just the thing. Wait here….
What John thinks: ( No. Dear. God. No.)
Shelley: Oh! Ha! Ha! Ha! You “have” to put a pair on with me. John, take our picture? Aren’t these hysterical?
What John thinks: (*#$%ing hysterical)
What John says: Hysterical.
Shelley: I just don’t know. Can I try on that first black pair again?
Lyndon: Of course. John, would you like some pistachios?
What John thinks: (Of course I would. It’s lunchtime)
What John says: Thank you.
Shelley: It’s down to the red or the black. Which ones?
What John thinks:(I don’t care.)
What John says: The red. Definitely the red.
Shelley: It’s settled then. I’ll take the black ones.
Shelley: Wasn’t that fun?
What John thinks: Un@#%ing believably fun.
What John say: Wasn’t it just?
Shelley and John