We love spending time with family:
Ash and Andrew,
dad and mom,
Marina and Shenley.
During the barbecue, at the Car Dealership, where we bought our truck and fifth wheel,
I make my first attempt…
Todd (Car salesman): Shelley, John, this is my wife, Alicia.
Shelley and John: Hi. Nice to meet you.
Alicia: Cool hair.
Shelley: (Alicia could be my friend. Alicia will be my friend.) Thanks. Might as well have a little fun with it when it starts to turn white. What else can you do? Right? This part – all natural. This part- has a little help. Oh Ha! Ha! Ha!
Todd: Hey honey, touch rugby is starting up for the summer next Thursday.
Shelley: I’m definitely going even though I haven’t played for-ev-er. Going to have to get some soccer cleats. What do you think? Do you think I need them? Oh Ha! Ha! Ha!
Shelley: Do you play? Are you going? Want to be on my team? Oh Ha! Ha! Ha!
Shelley: Want to be my friend? Oh Ha! Ha! Ha!
Alicia:…Uh… I don’t know. It’s the first time I heard of it. Excuse me for a second. Todd?
While at the dentist’s… with John’s final words of encouragement ringing in my ears,
“Remember to ask the Dentist and his wife to come over for supper, or see if they want to go kayaking with us. And for God’s sake, don’t be too aggressive. Remember what happened with Alicia.”
I look for an opening.
Dentist’s wife: How are you liking the valley?
Shelley: Great. We’ve just bought new kayaks. Swifties. 9.5’s. We just love them. Well, actually we haven’t paddled in them yet. But, I have sat in mine at the store. Oh Ha! Ha! Ha! (Bring it down a notch)
Dentist’s wife: Really?
Shelley: Yes. We bought them in Oregon. Great deal, as there are no taxes there. Not like here, right? (Better)
Dentist’s wife: Oh, that’s right.
Shelley: We would love to go out with someone from the area, who could show us some routes. Maybe grab a beer or a glass of wine after. Or tea. It doesn’t have to be alcohol, if she doesn’t drink. I personally don’t think you have to drink to have a good time. Although I am not going to lie to you, I like to have a social drink. Red wine mostly. Good for your heart. What do you think? (Stop. Just stop!)
Dentist’s wife: That’s a great idea.
Shelley: Really? That’s great. Great. When do you guys want to join us? (I have a new friend! I have a new friend! I. HAVE. A. NEW. FRIEND!!!!)
Dentist’s wife: Oh, I’m so sorry, Shelley. I meant, it’s great that you guys are so interested in meeting people. But, we can’t commit to anything these days, because we’re always working. Besides, I am not sure you would want to come with us, because we always go skinny dipping when we’re out kayaking.
Shelley: (What? Euhhh!) Really? Wow.
Dentist’s wife: Comox Valley has a Paddling Club that meets on Thursdays. Why don’t you and John go to one of their meetings? I heard they’re really nice.
Shelley: (S#$%!) At the end of the Comox Valley Paddling Club meeting… I attempt to clarify our plan.
Shelley: What the Hell? Why didn’t you get up with me to introduce ourselves?
John: I didn’t see any reason for both of us to talk.
Shelley: You are such a jerk. You’re the one who said we should come here tonight and then you leave it up to me to try and make some friends. Do you know how stupid I felt when the President insisted that I stand on a chair to introduce myself?
John: You were great. Everyone loved your little speech about working overseas, buying kayaks and asking if they wanted to be our friends.
Shelley: Whatever. You better promise me that the next time we do the “finding friends thing,” we do it together, no matter what, one hundred percent, or, I’m done.
John: (S#$%!) Promise.