Honey to Compete in Tough Mudder Whistler 2013

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Shelley: John, you can’t compete in Tough Mudder on your own. It won’t be any fun for you.

John: Of course I can. 

Shelley: But the spirit of Tough Mudder is, and I quote,

“Tough Mudders are team players who make sure no one gets left behind. To that end, all Mudders℠ are expected to uphold our ideals and exhibit teamwork and camaraderie both on the course and off it.”

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John: I know that. But seeing as Steve is working, Shenley is hurt, Spencer is biking (my brothers)  and Andrew and Matt (our sons) have Andrew’s Stag party that weekend, there’s not much I can do about it. Don’t worry

Shelley: But I am worried… You need someone to share the experience with you again.

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Other wise you’re going to be out there for four hours on your own. There must be someone elsesomeone….. Ahhhhh… I can’t think of anyoneExcept... Except…. Oh God help me…

 I’ll do it with you.

John: No.Your knees can’t take it.

Shelley: I just ran 15K and they were fine. Besides,  you said that most of the running is on old logging roads.

Tough mudder

John: You’ll have to swim through ice water, then crawl over obstacles. You know how you hate to be cold.

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Shelley: I’ll buy Under Armour. Pink. 

John: And crawl “G.I. Joe Style” under razor wire.

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Shelley:  I’ll practice crawling around the house.

John: Swing across monkey bars.

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Shelley: Oh please. I’m a climber.

John: Get zapped by 10,000 volts of electricity.

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Shelley: I can take it.

John: You’ll have to train hard. That means running, upper body workouts…

Shelley: Done.

John: It will cost $165 to register. You do get a T-shirt and a head band once you complete the course, because then you would be a

TOUGH MUDDER!!!!!

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Shelley: Yeouchhhh!!!!! Are you kidding me? I don’t want to buy the company.

John: Hey! That’s my line. 

Shelley and John: Oh! Ha! Ha! Ha! 

John: Are you 100% sure you want to be a Tough Mudder? Because, if you change your mind, you can’t get a refund.

Shelley: 100%. Quick! Register me before I back out.

John:… Done. Welcome to “Team Zoomers!”

Shelley: ARRRRRRGHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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RING!!! RING!! RINNNGGGGG!!!!!

John: Hello. Hey Spencer.

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Your biking trip is cancelled? That’s too bad… No way? That’s awesome! Hang on. Let me tell Shelley. Shelley, best to sit down for this…

Spencer just signed up for Tough Mudder.

Shelley and John

Here’s John, Andrew, Phil and James competing inTough Mudder Whistler 2012.

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18 thoughts on “Honey to Compete in Tough Mudder Whistler 2013

  1. Damn that Spencer! This is a great post, but the one with Shelly running the race would have been priceless. The Tough Mudder looks… well, tough… like lots of fun. Great photos, Shelly and congrats, John on your T-shirt.

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  2. So John lost his hair due to barbed wire then? Mine fell out due to the bloody gales along the River here. I know, I know you have him well insured and force the poor bloke to risk life n limb on your ‘days out’. We Brits aren’t the brightest button on the shirt are we…………”No FRed(tm) that wasn’t a question and yes they are quite remarkable I agree.”

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      • Living on an Estuary we have Mud Runs and the Iron Man Challenges but, we are expected to wear suits (bespoke not oRf the peg) and carry brollies. Non of that baseBall cap nonsense with us nope. I expect it’s too late for John now as y’all have forced the poor man to have ‘implants’ to be more Canadian? Oh well, that’ll teach him to leave this rain sodden island for a proper country.

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      • Am going to be looking for the lost Brit in his bespoke suit at the start of Mudder. John sleeps in his cap, he is so Canadianized. (Is that a word???) As for rain sodden, the rain is back on the island… time to think about a back splash!!

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      • The only “back splash” we get here are in the Gents and there’s a sign saying “DOn’t eat the big white mint”. Some men get very confused when the ‘mint’ is yellow though.
        Orf now to run a marathon,compete in a boiled egg eating contest and buy a cap. Oh yes, and transplant some large bamboo trees that are about to Invade France.

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      • Oh! Ha! Ha! Ha! Your loos are disgusting!!! Enjoy your active day. Am betting on the boiled egg eating contest. I understand if you don’t smash the ends of the shells, you’ll be disqualified.

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      • We really really need to meet up when you are both in England. I bring the Valium .
        The Dorchester for Afternoon Tea, wot wot?

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