The Sales Whisperer


Bonnie: Welcome to Luz Bridal Boutique. (Click here to view link) How can I help you?

Shelley: I’m looking for a “Mother of the Groom” dress.

Bonnie: Do you have an idea of what it would look like?

Shelley:  Sort of.  Classy, but not too matronly. Not floor length. Not a mini length. Solid colours. Spring colours. Obviously not black or white. No heavy material. Maybe chiffon or silk. Not one shoulder. Not a halter. No sleeves. And definitely, not strapless. I’m still not over what happened to me years ago when John and I attended an Officer’s Ball with our friends, Dave and Lorraine. It was just after we rode a Simulator, (Standing up) when I looked down and lo and behold, the neckline of my dress way way lower than it was supposed to be.


Talk about embarrassing. Anyhoooo that’s about it.

Bonnie: Why don’t you take a look through these racks?

Shelley: Oooohhhh this one’s lovely. Huh! Shannon (My sister), look at the price. $220.


Bonnie: That’s the average price for the type of dress you’re looking for. Maybe you would like to start with the sale’s rack. They’re not damaged, just discontinued.

Shelley: Thank you. $40. Now we’re talking. Hey! What do you know? This is the same dress I picked out in Courtenay, except for the colour. That’s kind of disappointing. I thought we would spend the day together shopping.

Shannon: Are you kidding? I hate shopping. This is great. First Bridal store. First dress. I must have done something right in my previous life.

Shelley: Ha! Ha! Maybe I should try on more than this one though, just to make sure. Ooohhhh! Isn’t that too cute?

Shannon: (Sits down.)

Bonnie: Let me hang them up for you.

Shelley: Thank you. Too bad I didn’t bring my new sandals.

Bonnie: We have sandals.

Shelley: Thank you. Hmmm…. I’m not sold on this one. The colour doesn’t suit me.

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Bonnie: What colour would you like? We can order one for you. But it might take a few weeks.

Shelley: Better not risk it. Let’s try this little pink number. What about this one?

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Shannon: The colour’s great. But there’s something wrong with the material. It doesn’t lay flat.

Shelley: You’re right. And check out the bust. I look like I’m wearing Madonna’s cone bra.

Shelley and Shannon: Oh! Ha! Ha! Ha!

Bonnie: Our seamstress can take care of that. She’s very talented.

Shelley: So, that’s a maybe. Let’s try another one. I love the full skirt on this and the colour. But it’s strapless.

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Bonnie: Our seamstress can add straps.

Shelley: Definitely will think about that one too. YIKES!!!! It’s not on sale. How about the lilac one? Hmmm…. Not sure of the neckline.

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Bonnie: What kind of neck line would you like? Sweetheart? Bateau? Queen Ann? You name it. Our seamstress can sew it.

Shelley: I don’t really know what all that means. Let’s move on to the peach one.

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Bonnie and Shannon: Great colour. Very classy for the Mother of the Groom.

Shelley: Which is important, as I am a very very classy mother. But it’s too big here. Maybe too long. And wayyy too low. The straps need shortening. Too bad, I really like this one.

Bonnie: Not a problem for our seamstress. She calls herself

“The Dress Whisperer.”

Shelley: Wow! She must be good. You know what, Bonnie? You’re good too. Real good. But let’s see how good you really are. What I really need is more of these to make those dresses fit perfectly. Can you give me more, Bonnie?

Shelley: Damn, Bonnie, you’re not good, you’re awesome. What the Hell, at $40 each, I’ll take two dresses and two sets of those puppies. One last thing, any song suggestions for the mother son dance?
2013-05-18 14.57.53


Shelley and John


24 thoughts on “The Sales Whisperer

  1. Now what about the necklace ? Does John have deep pockets or can you rent him out for a while to get the perfect jewellery to go with it? ANd don’t let him wear a cap, nope. Downton Abbey vs, Relaxed ex-Brit is a difficult match. Good luck.


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  3. Pingback: My 5 Pieces of Advice on Being a Wedding M.C. | Tylor in Trier

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