After being constantly badgered by a plethora of loyal readers to publish “Honey Did you See That?” (OK, OK, three, four tops, may have casually mentioned the idea) Honey decided to doo doo or get off the pot.
Her plan, self-publish “Honey.”
But, after reading 29 Questions ready for download (click left for advice on self-publishing) by Cristian Mihai, Honey realized that self-publishing was way, way, wayyyyyyyy too complicated. Translation: Honey is lazy.
What Honey needed was a literary agent.
But who? Who would best represent Honey’s interests?
more honestly, who? Who would do all the work, while Honey jet-setted around the world, attending lavish book signing parties, while sipping Armand de Brignac Gold Champagne. And who? Who should Honey invite to be part of her entourage???
Weeks, days, hours, minutes were spent thoroughly investigating possible literary agents. One by one they were rejected until Weeks, days, hours, minutes later, Honey chose Byrd Leavell, Justin Halpern’s, author of Sh*t My Dad Says, agent.
What a stroke of luck to discover Byrd Leavell had a Twitter account. Honey immediately became a
stalker follower. What an even bigger stroke of luck to read this Tweet from Byrd Leavell.
Can anyone out there think of a memoir told in a shifting narrative between the husband and wife?
Was there ever a clearer message from above? Byrd Leavell was destined to be Honey’s agent. Honey tweeted back,
I sure do. “Honey did you see That?” is exactly what you are looking for.
Honey was beyond pleased with herself. With less than an hour of incredibly hard work, she had made contact with the man himself, Byrd Leavell. Giddy, Honey poured herself a Cougar Town size glass of red wine, dug into her secret stash of chocolate chips, sat back and confidently waited for Byrd Leavell’s offer.
His response was immediate.
BYRD LEAVELL DELETED HER TWEET!!!!!!
Honey was devastated. Traumatized.
However, eventually, buoyed by her husband John’s strong words of encouragement,
“Honey, put that bottle of wine down! Get back on that computer! Smiths don’t quit!”
Honey regrouped, unearthed the e-mail address of Byrd Leavell’s Agency and submitted a few of hers and John’s favourite posts.
This time Byrd Leavell did not hit the delete key. This time he wrote back. Cross Honey’s Heart, and hope to die, he really did. See!