Fish On! Oh Yeeeaahhhhhhhh Baby!!!

As the full moon rises on Kelsey Bay, Sayward, Vancouver Island, John and I reflect on the day’s salmon fishing… from kayaks, no less…

Shelley: Got one. Fish on. Fish. On. Oh! Yeeeaahhhhhhhh!!! Baby!!! The net. The net! Get the net!

Aiiiiieeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!! He’s dragging me out to sea! For the love of God John, hurry!  I don’t want to end up as “The Old Lady and the Sea.” 

Oh Jesus! Nooooooo! He dove under my kayak. He surfaced on the other side! Oh! Oh! I’m going to tip. HOLY SHIT! Don’t let him tip me over! This water is FREAKIN’ COLD!!! What’s taking you so long? I knew we should have fished from the wharf. What in the world were we thinking?John: John: Stay calm. Almost there. Reel it in as slow as you can.

Shelley: Too late. It’s slapping the side of the kayak. Oh F@#K it! Ah! Ha! Gotcha. Stop wriggling! Hold still you little… Yeouchhhhh!!! The hook’s stuck in my arm. Never mind. Just grab this little beauty.

John: Did you just “Skirt the fish?” with your kayak skirt? As in, when the NHL players shirt each other during a fight?

Shelley: Sure did. No choice. Couldn’t risk losing it. Let that be a reminder to never to mess with me.

Shelley and John: Oh! Ha! Ha! Ha!

John: Pass it over. I’ll tie it on the rope.

Shelley: No. We just lost three fish by tying them on the rope. I’ve a better idea, put it between your legs.

John: Very funny. Ha! Ha!

Shelley: I’m serious.

John: Shelley. No. That is not a better idea. I’ll make sure the knot doesn’t open this time. I am not going to put a bloody fish between my legs. Absolutely not. You put it between your legs.

Shelley: Don’t be silly.

John: Fine. Euuuuhhhhhhhh!!! He’s flapping between my legs. Blood’s flying everywhere.

I don’t understand why I have to be the one who has to…. GOT ONE!!!!!! YEAH BABY! The net. The net! GET THE NET!!! 

Wait.

Change of plans. Film first, then get the net. Otherwise no one will ever believe we caught salmon out of kayaks, especially Matt and Andrew. (Our sons, who haven’t caught a fish in the last two summers.) 

http://To salmon fishing from kayaks. Cheers. 

Daily Prompt: Funny Ha-Ha

Shelley and John