Shelley: After 136 days on the road, we’ve finally arrived in Los Cabos. It’s everything the books say and more; temperatures in the high 20’s, warm blue azure waters gently lapping on blindingly white sandy beaches, dazzling blue skies and soft breezes. Everyone’s happy, thankful they are escaping winter.
John: Thank you Miss Tour Guide of the Year.
Shelley: Ha! Ha! Los Cabos, Home of No Bad Days. Si?
Hawker #1: Have you been to Los Cobos before?
Shelley: First time.
Hawker #2: I remember you from last year.
Shelley: Ha! Ha! Is that right?
Hawker #3 You’re wearing a Mexican cowboy hat.
Shelley: Sure am. I bought it in Algodones, Mexico.
Hawker #4: Then you should buy one from Los Cabos.
Shelley: I’m good. Thanks.
Hawker #5: Can I interest you in a dress?
Shelley: No, gracias.
Hawker #6: Ah! Ha! It’s all coming back to me. I first saw you when you arrived at the airport last night.
Shelley: Ha! Ha! Now that would have been quite a sight, watching us roll off the plane in our truck towing a 28 foot RV.
Hawker #7: You look like lovers. Maybe you’d like to go kayaking to Lover’s Beach?
Shelley: No gracias. We have our own kayaks. We’re heading there tomorrow.
Hawker #8: Fishing? Want to catch the big swordfish? $175 for 5 hours in a panga, plus cost of bait, plus fishing license, plus lunch and drinks, plus tax.
John: No, gracias.
Hawker #9: Amigos? Whale watching? Whale watching for you? Only $65 American per person.
Shelley: Tempting, since we’ve only seen the humpbacks from our hike on Mt.Solmar, but no, gracias.
Hawker #10: Hola! Can I interest you in a Sunset cruise?
Tourist walking by: What you need to do is speak German. Works every time.
Hawker #10: So does my dog.
Shelley: Ha! Ha! Got you there.
Hawker #11: Senora! Booze Cruise?
Shelley: No, gracias.
Hawker #12: Water taxi?
Shelley: No thank you. John, ready for lunch?
Waiter: Lunch? You want lunch? We can give you lunch plus two for one beers. Sit wherever you like.
Shelley: Here’s OK?
Waiter: Yes. Yes.
Shelley: One Corona each and the menu, please.
Waiter: No. No. You have to order a bucket of six beer to sit in the front. If you don’t, you have to eat in the back.
Shelley: Hang on. You said we could sit anywhere we want.
John: Shelley, it’s important to always be polite. These guys are just trying to make a living.
Shelley: You’re right. I’m sorry for making a fuss. We’ll sit in the back. How does the two for one work?
Waiter: You order a beer and the second one’s free.
Shelley: I don’t want two beers. Do you John?
John: No. I’m running later.
Shelley: Is it possible for us to order one beer and when the two beers arrive we share them?
Waiter: No problem.
Shelley: We’ll have one beer.
Waiter: Here you go.
Shelley: Oh I’m sorry, there must be some mistake. We don’t want four beers, we ordered one beer, which means you bring us two.
Waiter: No, you said, “‘We’ll’ have one beer.” That’s what I brought you. One beer each. When you order one beer, you get a second one for free.
Manager: Senora, it’s no problem. You don’t want those two beers, we’ll give them to someone else. Life’s too short.
Shelley: Thank you so much. I apologize for the mix up.
Manager: No need. Los Cabos home of no bad days. Am I right?
Shelley: You’re right. You’re absolutely right.
Hawker #13: Silver necklace? Earrings?