I Would go After that Deadly, Killer, Poisonous Son of a Bitch and Kill it by Ripping its Head Off

John and I have left the Coachella Valley (Palm Springs) for the Anza-Borrego Desert State Park area. Tomorrow we plan on hiking the “Borrego Palm Canyon Nature Trail” and checking out the “Palm Slots.” As the weather has been unseasonably warm (sorry friends in the north) there is a possibility that little critters such as…

The Best Wife Ever

January 1st, 2014, 1:00pm over lunch…. John: New Year’s resolutions everyone. I’ll go first. I’m going to get a six pack. Matt: You know you can go to the store and buy one. Everyone: Oh! Ha! Ha! Ha! Andrew: I’m going to finish my rugby qualifications. Ash: I’m going to try to live more with… Matt:…

Sweet Home Alabama

John: (Singing) Sweet hooome Alabama. I be coming home to you. Shelley: Oh my God. Stop. John: What? Shelley: You’ve tried to sing that song ever since we arrived in Alabama. John: Alabama? (Singing) Sweet hooome Alabama. I be coming home to you. Shelley: Please stop. You’re ruining it. Those aren’t the right words. And even if…

I Think I Have Acid Reflux, Appendicitis, Heart Arythmia…

John:  I have something I want to share with you. Something very serious. Something that you might want to prepare for. Shelley: Oh my God. What? John: I have Acid Reflux. Shelley: You have what? John: Acid Reflux. Shelley: Oh Jesus. John: I googled my symptoms. I’ll have to undergo a dangerous life threatening operation. Shelley:…